I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
His hands were made for my vagina.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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