i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
