She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
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