I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
