So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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