She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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