i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
