Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
The feeling are messing with the penis
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
