I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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