I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Panties = found
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