..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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