i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
