you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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