It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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