You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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