yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
