I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
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