Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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