How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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