I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
