me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
