I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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