Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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