Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
