Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
