using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
