I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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