OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
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