I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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