Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Randomize
