My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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