I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
This is the high leading the old right now
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Success! We fucked roommates!
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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