i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
