well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
