We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
