yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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