my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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