Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
