If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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