can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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