and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
i believe in u and ur pee
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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