i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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