I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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