Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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