YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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