the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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