All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
