do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Randomize
