Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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