some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
